Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Caption THIS!


Week Eleven - Bonus Question

I am afraid this season has gone Belly Up. What is the origin of that phrase?

Week Ten - Bonus Answer

Skeleton!

It's first two appearances were in 1928 and 1948, both times when the winter games were held in St. Moritz.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Happy Thanksgiving!


From Karen, Jessica, and Jaime and Oliver Phelps, the Weasley Twins.

Caption THIS!


Week 10 - BONUS QUESTION

We find ourselves in Salt Lake City, home of the 2002 Winter Games. What sport was included as a medal sport at these games for only the third time in Olympic history?

BONUS ANSWERS - Week Nine

1. Francis Scott Key's home in Georgetown was dismantled in 1947 to make way for an entrance ramp to the Whitehurst Freeway. Congrats to Chris H who was the only one to find this! I did, however, also accept the park as an answer.

2. A Wobble was a six-day endurance footrace that was popular in England and New York in the 1880s. The Bransens would have done terrible because, um, Wally? Not too into that whole "in-shape" thing.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Happy Harry Potter Day!

I've already got my tickets.

Bonus Answer - Week 8

The Bransens would have looked for a chalk drawing of a top hat, because during the Great Depression that was the hobo sign for "rich gentleman lives here". Cool!

Bonus Questions - Week 9

We're back in America! At least the show is showing a little respect to American History. Much more so than Washington DC showed to the house of Francis Scott Key. What structure was built on the site of Francis Scott Key's house?

We're down to the final four! If this was a wobble, why would the Bransens probably be the next to go?

Good luck!

Friday, November 11, 2005

The Amazing Case Photos

Enjoy, y'all.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Episode Seven - My Thoughts

I'm feeling like a lazy recapper today, so I think we're just going to get random thoughts for each team.

Bransens


  • You know, girls, you can either 1) have no faith in your dad's physical strenghth or 2) let him do all the physical tasks. I don't think it works to do both. But your little dialogue "I can get in!" (wally at the swimming challenge) "Are you sure?" (Bransen girls in unison) was kinda funny.
  • Wally: I'm glad you "don't want to make a mistake" at the Go-Karts, but how hard is it to screw something up that involves you driving around in a circle?

Godlewskis

  • You brought toilet paper? And somehow kept it after all your stuff was taken away? Don't think I didn't see that roll stretching out across the road when one of your bags fell!
  • Apparently, Arizona is "hotter than snot". I'm not sure how hot snot is, but thanks for sharing that delightful commentary.

Linz

  • You know, I wrote absolutley nothing down about y'all on the first hour tonight. But you better come in first on at least one leg here, kids! At least the last one. When it counts.

Paolo

  • Oh, was Mama Paolo throwing around the one liners tonight! I'm not sure what was better, "I'm gonna have more muscles than brains in my head when I'm done with this race", or "Why are we going to Phoenix? I want to go to New Zealand!" Who am I kidding? The latter is far more superior, and echoing the sentiments of devoted Race Fans everywhere...
  • The only good thing about Tony almost drowning is that we got a glimpse of some of the local production crew. Kind of nice to give the locals a moment in the sun, right?
  • There was something just so...I dunno...pastoral about the Italian immigrant singing on the back of a truck with big sticks in it. And there's more of a joke to be made but I can't pull it out of my brain right now.
  • You know, the Paolos were downright awesome (and one both legs) while out of the country. It must be the US soil that does something to their brains, becuse the minute they were back on the ground they were up to their usual arguing antics.
  • I'm trying to control my laughter that's still continuing from their getups at the pitstop. At least it was more sensible than the Godlewski thongs (and more supportive than they are to each other)! But Phil was right. They looked ridiculous. But if they'd taken time to count to, oh, I dunno, THREE and notice how many cars were actually there, they wouldn't have needed to do it at all!

Weavers

  • You know, I hate to keep harping on your guys. Wait, I'm not sorry at all. And here we go!
  • I'm thinking that Rolly just might be Brandon's long lost brother. Christian but not overtly crazy, and coming out of the water he totally had that Blue Lagoon think going for him.
  • Did they actually chant "Go Arnold Go!" for two and a half hours in the Costa Rican cab? I was kind of hoping they would, and the cab driver would put out an APB on them to all other cabbies not to pick them up.
  • "What state are we in again?" Need I even comment on that?
  • If I had been that dude at the track that you said you needed someone who was "compassionate", I would have shown you the nearest church and not let you race. Maybe that would have been more your speed.
  • When some nice ladies come up to you to try to make you feel okay about your mom out on a GO KART on a race track after your dad died at a track, they're probably sincere. I don't think I'd return their kindness by saying how they lie and are so mean to you.
  • And again, kids, it's a GO KART. No need to freak out until they have, like, crash-test dummies littered around that you have to "avoid the pit crew" or something.
  • Here is the link to the CBS glossary of Race Terms. Please note the definition of the yield. If I were you, I'd spend less time interrogating DJ Paolo about why he used it on your and following it up with a "We've still got our yield, sweets", and instead worry about the little fact that YOU CAN GET YIELDED AGAIN, YOU DUMBASS.
  • Need some help with your kids, Ma? I found someone who can help you!
  • I think the Weavers need a mirror to hold up to see their behavior and their words. And to fix their pants, too.
  • I think they should have tried out for this show. Because it'd be a miracle if you were ever nice to someone.
  • It is amazing that as much as they hate speedways and racing, they drive likes bats out of hell on every single stretch of road. I'm just saying.
  • I have this dream for next week, where the teams go to Independence, Missouri, and Phil says "This is the scared returning place of Jesus according to Mormons. Look up 5 verses in the Book of Mormon that exemplify good family practices" and Ma throws a fit in which she refuses to touch a "sacred" text that doesn't involve hot pants or thowing garbage at other teams.
  • With all their paranoia and delusions, these dudes really are a four person Mirna. Oh, the scariness of typing that sentence.
  • But, really, what I think it boils down to is that this family is a textbook example of people who create the situations they fear, project all their own bad behavior onto other people, they're defensive and nasty, they haven't given any of the others a single reason to like them, and then they just get mystified by their social isolation. Maybe they're President Bush's favorite team. That certainly describes his foreign policy.

And with that it's Scrappy, signing off.

Caption THIS!


Week 7/8 Team Scores / Pool Scores

Team Scores

  1. Godlewski 230 (745)
  2. Linz 230 (805)
  3. Weaver 210 (605)
  4. Bransen 130 (675)
  5. Paolos -80 (585

Pool Scores

  1. Adam 2870 (3)
  2. Jan 2585 (3)
  3. Karen 2415 (3)
  4. Jonathan 2390 (3)
  5. Linda 2335 (2)
  6. Stephanie 2300 (3)
  7. Allegra 2290 (2)
  8. Mark F 2285 (2)
  9. Judy 2185 (2)
  10. Dave A 2095 (2)
  11. Dave 1905 (1)
  12. Jill 1850 (2)
  13. Kristin L 1825 (2)
  14. Ashlee 1760 (2)
  15. Sarah 1645 (2)
  16. Mary P 1630 (2)
  17. Liz 1610 (2)
  18. Mark (2), Scott (2) 1605
  19. Chris (2), Mike (2) 1590
  20. Victor 1585 (2)
  21. Jay 1575 (2)
  22. Mary 1555 (1)
  23. Laura 1550 (2)
  24. Eric 1510 (1)
  25. Les 1450 (2)
  26. Samuel 1375 (2)
  27. Caitlin 1335 (2)
  28. Curt 1285 (1)
  29. Frank 1265 (2)
  30. Chris H 1165 (1)
  31. Anton 1080 (1)
  32. Peter 1035 (1)
  33. Bari 1000 (1)
  34. Ben 865 (1)
  35. Joanna 815 (1)
  36. Tracy 730 (1)
  37. Kristin 615 (0)

Week Eight Bonus Question

We ran into another Non-Elimination Leg in the first hour of tonight's race.

If the race had taken place, oh, 75 or 80 years ago, why would the Bransens have sought a chalk drawing of a top hat?

Good luck!

Week Seven Bonus - ANSWER

And the answer is...William Walker!

Here is the article I originally found on the "crazy man's war" of 1856.

Today, however, when I was trying to find a site to put up with a little about Walker, I came across this one. That almost makes him sound like a hero. Stupid Americans and their manifest destiny.

Monday, November 07, 2005

Well, we did it

I'm proud to say the Scrappy Monkeys came in a respectable 12th place in the first annual "Amazing Case" in Minneapolis. I don't remember much after the, oh, fifth bar, but that's okay! We've got lots of pictures and, as soon as I get them uploaded, a link will be available.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Episode Six - My Thoughts

An open letter to The Weaver Clan.

by Allegra J. Lingo

Dear Weavers,

I realized tonight that I miss the good ol' days from episodes of yore (well, fourteen days ago) when I just thought you were really stupid. Like, an inbred Forrest Gump kinda dumb. But tonight, we just learned so many things about you that I'm ready to dock myself 100 points in the pool for picking you as one of my four teams. Sigh.

Ma Weaver, good call on tonight's episode title quote, "I'm sick of doing stuff I can't do." I have a feeling you didn't just mean driving stick or getting your van out of the mud. Maybe raising respectful children? That seems to be something you've got a problem with. Whose fault is it that you have daughters that admit they were raised not to trust other people? That must be that platinum rule they forgot to put in the Bible, making it worth more than the Golden Rule of "do unto others as you would have them do unto you", because I'm fairly certain you wouldn't want people doing the following:


  • Making fun of someone for their profession (Papa Paolo) and standing in front of their company car (well, I can't say too much about that because I just did that last week).
  • When teams tell you "Good luck, it's harder than hell" (Megan Linz) your answer is, naturally, "They're lying. We'll show them."
  • Calling everything, including an inanimate object (the volcano), retarded.
  • Demonstrating a level of maturity Carissa Gaghan achieved upon conception, exemplified when responding to the yield by dissing every other team to make yourself feel better, and asking how much the Godlewski sisters' boobs cost. Although, I have a feeling this was actually a serious inquiry, because what I see in the future for these two daughters is a lifetime of hotpants, bikers, and bad run-ins with hair dye (well, they got the hotpants and hair dye woes already).

It's nice to know that you think highly of yourself, especially when you say "We're Christians and we're above them." Very Jesus like. Except, my Jesus hung out with the prostitutes and lepers. I have a feeling you wouldn't be doing that any time soon. You are to Christianity what the Hindenburg was to transatlantic airship travel. You totally bypassed snarky (a compliment, in my book) and went straight to snotty fuckwad (there's just no other word to use right there). For a minute, I thought you were going to drive off and leave your kids to fend for themselves and their camera crew, relying on Rolly's fluent Mirnish (two new entrieds: "righto" and "lefto") to get you back home. I guess God' guides you until you get stuck in the mud, huh?

So, WWJD? I think He'd kick some Weaver ass. I found myself wondering if there's a national sanitation worker's union, because if there is, I don't think you're ever getting pick-up again. And remember, it's not cool to make fun of someone for being a garbage man when your dad got killed clearing debris (or did you not know what that word meant?).

So, I close with a line from Dennis Leary:

Lady, your husband isn't dead. He's hiding.

And on with some other random thoughts:

Gaghans

  • Dude, you guys were not supposed to go out so soon! It's sad, sniff, now I'm moving on.
  • Carissa was totally cute getting ready to run to Costa Rica, if need be (she probably would have gotten there the same time her mom got done with the roadblock).
  • Likewise-cuteness goes to Billy being a little monster in the back of the van.
  • Coffee Beans? Totally the new Haystacks. Those were definitley not cool beans (please don't hit me, Anton and Peter!).
  • Why didn't Carissa do the roadblock? I totally thought she would, especially after they've spent every episode telling Carissa "nice eyes" on spotting all the flags and stuff. That would have been awesome.
  • The shot of Carissa on the dark, deserted streets of San Jose, clutching the water bottle? That was straight out of "Oliver Twist: Costa Rica".

Paolos

  • You came in first? Again? Good lord! I do hope that at least DJ and Mama choose the Segway people movers. How awesome would that be to see them chasing each other around and shouting on those down the Atlantic City Boardwalk or something?!
  • I admit, I'm starting to like these dudes. Jerry Maguire might have had Renee Zellwegger at "hello", but they had me at "I'm coming!" "Yeah? So is Christmas."
  • These dudes also had the (mis)fortune to run into the best drunk local this side of Iceland. Yeah!
  • I noticed for the first time tonight that DJ and Jonathan - excuse me, he-who-must-not-be-named - wear the same brand of clothing? Coincidence? I think not. Don't believe me? Check it out for yourselves.

Godlewskis

  • Oh, boo hoo. You lost all your money. And then you got some again. I do think, however, this is the first time that any local has answered "I don't have money. I have love." EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. Apparently he didn't see them last week with their underwear on their head.
  • Good line, one of your shrieking harpies, with "Could we get cinco dinero? Viente would be fine, too." That made me laugh.
  • That's all I wrote about you. Now stop fighting and keep in the race. And do something interesting.

Bransens

  • You don't know what a relic is? Sad, sad, sad.
  • That's all I wrote down about you. Now go do something good.

Linzes

  • Apparently, I thought you were really boring last night, because I didn't write down anything about you. See second bullet points to the Godlewskis and Bransens.

Ethnic Greeter

  • Was your biological clock ticking or something? You just looked like the saddest thing having to help philiminate the Gaghan kids. Seriously. Go back and check out the tape (if you taped it) of her face. It's awesome.

Yield History

Well, the Yield that has never played a significant role in the Race makes its first appearance. For those of you who are not Weaver or Paolo fans, this is not the best news if you want to see either of those teams gone.

  • In Race 5, Chip and Kim yielded Colin and Christie. Chip and Kim came in first place, Colin and Christie second.
  • In Race 6, two yields were used. Adam and Rebecca first Yielded Freddy and Kendra, and then Freddy and Kendra got them back and yielded Adam and Rebecca. Freddy and Kendra came in first place, Adam and Rebecca came in third.
  • In Race 7, Rob and Amber yielded Ron and Kelly. Rob and Amber came in second, Ron and Kelly came in third.

Will the use of the Yield which makes no difference continue to serve as a predictor for good race results? Tune in next week, when Mama Weaver continues to go batshit crazy and Papa Paolo nearly drowns.

Scrappy (or, as the below picture from Halloween would seem to indicate, Harry Potter), signing off.

Caption THIS!

Have fun!

Week Six Team / Pool Scores

Team Scores
  1. Paolo 205 (655)
  2. Linz 125 (565)
  3. Bransen 85 (545)
  4. Godlewski 85 (515)
  5. Weaver 15 (515)
  6. Gaghan -125 (155)

Pool Scores

  1. Adam 2090 (3)
  2. Linda 1995 (3)
  3. Jan 1930 (3)
  4. Allegra 1870 (3)
  5. Mark F 1845 (3)
  6. Dave A 1795 (3)
  7. Judy 1765 (3)
  8. Jonathan 1710 (3)
  9. Dave (2), Karen (3), Stephane (3) 1680
  10. Jill 1480 (2)
  11. Mary 1345 (2)
  12. Eric 1340 (2)
  13. Kristin L 1335 (2)
  14. Sarah 1275 (2)
  15. Ashlee 1270 (2)
  16. Mark (2), Scott (2) 1235
  17. Victor 1215 (2)
  18. Mary P 1180 (2)
  19. Jay 1165 (2)
  20. Liz 1140 (2)
  21. Chris (2), Mike (2) 1120
  22. Les (2), Laura (2) 1110
  23. Curt 1040 (1)
  24. Samuel 1005 (2)
  25. Caitlin (2), Chris H (1) 885
  26. Anton 840 (1)
  27. Frank 815 (2)
  28. Bari 760 (1)
  29. Peter 750 (1)
  30. Kristin 745 (1)
  31. Ben 625 (1)
  32. Joanna 575 (1)
  33. Tracy 480 (1)

Week SEVEN - BONUS QUESTION

The race teams aren't the only ones that are a bit frightened by the Weavers. Why, according to their history, would to Costa Ricans be a bit scared of a crazy American from the southern States?

Good luck!

Week Six Bonus - ANSWER

The answer is William Van Ingen, and the murals hang in the Panama Canal Administration Building.

Good job, nearly everyone!

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Media Prufrock

credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non vivo alcun, s'i'odo vero,
Senza tema dinfamia ti rispondo.

Let us go then, you and I,
When the evening is spread out the sky
Like a etherised upon a table;
Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets,
The muttering retreats
Of restless nights in cheap hotels
And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells:
Streets that follow a tedious Of insidious intent
To lead you to an overwhelming question ...
Oh, do not ask, "What is it?"
Let us go and make our visit.